What Your Bumper Sticker Is Really Saying

Every morning as I head to work I drive by my neighbor’s truck, which is covered in political and religious bumper stickers. The one that catches my eye most days says, “TRUTH, NOT TOLERANCE!” and every day I think, you know, I don’t really want to get to know that neighbor. Look, I’m all for bumper stickers and window decals, and I think it’s almost required for truck owners such as myself to proudly display their opinions and interests to fellow drivers who do not in any way give a shit, but I have to wonder…what is your bumper sticker really saying?

“COEXIST”: I drive slow and I don’t want people to yell at me for it.

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